Arrested for prostitution? Who Cares? Officer, take the handcuffs off this upstanding gentleman!

A Quote from a fiery Newsweek article titled: Prosecuting John: Why allowing Eliot Spitzer to break the law is a mistake:

“Former New York Governor Eliot Spitzer resigned in March 2008 after it was discovered that he had used women in prostitution, a violation of New York's comprehensive anti-trafficking law. Last week, we learned that the former prosecutor will not be prosecuted for breaking the law.”

Step 1: Eliot Spitzer becomes governor and earns a reputation for being tough on DIRTY crime in New York City.
Step 2: The FBI notice suspicious financial transactions among Governor Spitzer’s accounts and put him under surveillance.
Step 3: The lid is publicly blown off his prostitution scandal, Spitzer resigns, and his attractive wife stands bravely next to him while all the criminals he prosecuted eat popcorn and happily make bets on whether she will leave him.
Step 4: The Department of Justice decides to DROP THE CASE—I’m sure the fact that Spitzer has buddies in the legal system because he was a former US Attorney General probably has NOTHING to do with this decision.

Reaction:

THE next time I get pulled over for SPEEDING and the officer wants to give me a ticket I will say:
“Officer, earlier this year former Governor Spitzer’s long history of hiring prostitutes was revealed to the public. The main prostitute involved in this scandal has received numerous financially profitable offers from adult men’s magazines to do cover spreads and currently has a hit song on itunes called What We Want. The former governor, after spending around 80 thousand dollars on call girls over the past few years, didn’t get as much as a pair of handcuffs slapped on his wrists. These two are sitting pretty after screwing over New York citizens (no pun intended) and you want to punish ME for doing 45 in a 30 MPH zone?”

(Undoubtedly 10 minutes later I would probably find myself in a jail cell charged with resisting arrest. Meanwhile Eliot Spitzer would be at Cipriani, drinking red wine and dining on the remaining brittle fragments of justice within our legal system).

Didn’t Spitzer learn anything from the Clinton impeachment? Geez, at least Bill didn’t have to pay the interns.

Red Carlisle, Flickr